


A Mermaidic Promise

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gay, Homosexual, I'll just refer to you as person, I'm gonna shut up, M/M, Mermaids, Merstuck, Multi, again idk man or woman, as to avoid the gender thingy, don't read unless your around sixteen and up, fishtails attached to human torsos, genders are weird, humans being unaware of their watery fellows, i shouldn't use tags like i am at the moment, idk man, kind of mature, or hinted smut, will possibly be some smut in the future, you could be both male and female
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-09-22
Packaged: 2018-04-09 10:57:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4345892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave is strolling on a beach when he see's a humanized Karkat trying to get his ass to the ocean because he doesn't know how to use human legs since he got beached during a storm. Turns out Karkat has to stop a wedding between Eridan and one of the Peixeses. How will that end? I don't know but there is a bit of humour so thats fun. <br/>....<br/>Enjoy this weird romcom stupidity! Also Karkat makes a promise at one point so hooray to that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Short Prologue

Dave sighed heavily as he retreated to the beach on the outskirts of the forest with the perfect little sea just beyond the white specks of sand. Yet today nothing was quite like usual. A hurricane had hit pretty fucking hard and the once beautiful beach was now littered with ungodly amounts of debris. Though the young Strider was surprised that their cabin had survived while everything else was all kinds of ruined.  
But he just shrugged it off and continued walking the beach. Picking up shells that had surfaced from the sand being toussled about. No he takes it back. Now its a destructive beauty created by an array of broken branches and beached fish. Heh. Poor things porbably were dead since they couldn't get back in the water.


	2. MER-NAPPED BY A HUMAN!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat gets kidnapped by Dave Strider. Thats basically what happens. Oh and he screams for Eridan's help.

Karkat screamed as he was slapped onto land by the storm, terror wretched in his voice like a boa's constriction. Trying to crawl back but the water pushed him farther up the beach till his lights went out and he was pretty sure he was dead.  
That was until he woke up with his horns hidden by his now dry hair and..."WHAT ARE THOOOOOSE?" he yelled. Hands frantically dancing around his neck for gills that had closed to accommodate the change. His piercing red gaze staring in fear at the two legs that had traded space from the outrageous beauty of his precious tail that was there when he was last conscious.  
What has happened to you dear Karkat Vantas? You don't know but these turn of events are breaking your poor fragile heart. He attempts to stand but falls forward. His eyes finally landing on the bugle between his legs. "WHAT IS THAT!?" he shouts in fear. Beginning to drag his lower half behind him as he attempts to get back in the ocean that's just a few meters from him.  
"ERIDAN! HELP ME!" Karkat screams as he looks at the ocean. What happened? Where was the pod? Where was his friend?  
Shit this was bad. He heard of stories of what happened to mermaids that got beached. No this couldn't happen to him he had to be there for Eridan. Of all the times this could have happened. The wedding was still on and Eridan is probably freaking out that his best fish won't be there to fucking stop it as planned.  
But there was still time. If only he could get back in the- "Holy shit dude are you alright? Where are your clothes?" NOT A HUMAN! Karkat bared his teeth at the mortal. Hissing loudly in rage as he continued waddling on his elbows. "STAY BACK!" he growled his red eyes trained on the human who had dropped his shells and started walking over. "Do you need some help?" the mortal asked.  
"No- wait yes! I have to get in the water!" Karkat said. Looking from the boy to the ocean and his poor high blood friend who needed him at the moment who was so unaware of where Karkat was. "I have a very important mission and I can't fail!" he growled to himself. "Alright. Sure I can help" the mortal's hands landed onto his soft pale skin beneath his shoulder and hoisted him to his feet. "Can you walk?" the boy asked. Karkat bit his bottom lip.  
"Whats...whats walking? What is that monstrosity that just slipped from your food chute?" he asked. Sharp teeth apparent as the boy held him upright. "Oh god this is really bad" the human was wearing some kind of weird thing on his face. Karkat was trying to remember what humans called it. He and Eridan had come across a pair once and had messed around with it but that was lost because of the storm.  
"Uh, sure. Just...hold on..." Karkat lightly pushed from the male. Wobbling on his feet a little before gaining his balance. Attempting to move forward but only slamming into the taller human. "I AM SO NOT FUCKING USED TO THIS SHIT HOW DO YOU COD-LINGS DEAL WITH THIS!? WHAT EVEN ARE THESE STICKS ATTACHED TO MY LOWER HALF!???" he shouted. Glaring at the offending limbs.  
Face becoming a quick livid shade of red as the human kind of held him with utter confusion as to what was happening. All he knew was that this guy was in need of some help and had some serious amnesia. "Okay I got this" he murmured. Picking up the boy easily and holding him bridal style. Whistling when he saw the package in the smaller boy's lap. "Ali-oop" Dave began to walk away from the ocean instead of toward it as Karkat had wanted and had demanded for a good part of their meeting.  
Staying quiet as he moved when to his dismay Karkat started thrashing. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? THE OCEAN IS THERE! MY FRIEND IS THERE!" Karkat somehow leaped over Dave's shoulder and barrel rolled a few yards away and began to try and run/crawl his way back into the ocean. His fingers almost touching the liquid freedom when Dave snatched him up.  
"Okay listen here white boy I am up to my neck in your crazy bullshit because you are suffering amnesia- and are those horns?" he blinked behind his shades as he stared at the horns as red eyes began to fill with fear. "Shit- ERIDAN!" Karkat shouted. Dave picked up Karkat from the waist. "ERIDAN HELP ME!" he continued to shout as he was being dragged away.  
"ERIDAN!" he cried. Struggling in Dave's grasp and he only stopped shouting and screaming for his friend's help when they were in the forest far from the glorious beach and the sea beyond it.


	3. Sleepy End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Implies that Dave relieves himself of a boner, Karkat explains of a mermaid equivalent to a boner, and he also falls asleep with Dave at the end of the chapter.

Dave looked at Karkat who was now dressed in some of Bro's clothing and his own, confusion rattling him at the horns now obviously stationed permanently on this little rageball's head. "Okay so...horns? That...that a birth defect...or...I mean that is fucking rad and all but seriously are you even human?" he finally asked. Looking at the boy who was still investigating the clothing like it were alien armor.  
"No actually I am a 'humanoid' species of fish that are referred greatly in what you dare say is your history as mermaids. Now get me to the fucking ocean because I have shit to get done!" Karkat demanded. Still sitting down since walking was just. They were still working on the whole standing thing.  
Dave rubbed the back of his neck. "No you...your lying mermaids aren't fucking real this is the real world not a fanfic" Dave chastised. Looking down at the small man. "Well then I guess were in a fucking fanfic fin-eater" Karkat rolled his eyes at the audacity of this human. "Look if you don't believe me then get me wet" he offered. "But I mean...I'm not sure if that is safe...you could eat me, tear my insides, devour my carcass in some weird sick ritual shit, or turn me over to them" Karkat curled his knees into his chest and gulped.  
He knew what they did to mermaids. He trembled at the thought and pushed it aside. This human didn't seem to bad but there was still a chance he could end up getting Karkat killed. "Okay first off I hate fish its disgusting. No Strider eats fish- bad for the stomach. Second do I look like I would devour you in some ritual shit?" Dave asked. Karkat looked at him with wide eyes. "SO YOUR GIVING ME TO THEM?" he backed up farther into the couch of which Dave immediately assured him he wouldn't be giving him away to anybody.  
"Well okay. But what the hell is a Strider?"  
"I am. I am Dave Elizabeth Strider"  
Karkat nodded. "And I am a Karkat, a Karkat Vantas."  
Dave nodded. "So who's Eridan? Lover of yours?" he wondered. "Oh hell fucking no! That shit is so disturbing a topic to even touch but now look at what you've done! I have to touch this unfathomable rumpus with my bare hands! Eridan isn't my lover, thank Cod, he is my moirail and he's in a lot of trouble of this current moment" he raged. Dave nodded. "Okay Karkat. Anyway; do they have him? And who's they anyway?" He slowly sat on the table as Karkat re-situated himself to explain.  
"Black fabric wearing men with stern faces. Masked figures with weapons that send electricity to paralyze you...no Eridan is getting married which I guess is worse by comparison since there are teeth involved and not electricity" he murmured. "And how is that bad?" Dave chuckled at the thought of a mermaid wedding. "As soon as the royal picks a mate she'll mate with him for a week and then eat him. Tough life but me and Eridan are peasant dwellers so that's why they pick us since we are 'the weak link' that keeps the pod together" Karkat rubbed his head as he looked at Dave who was most certainly dumbfounded. "By the way what is on your face?"  
The blond haired male touched his mouth. "My lips?" he raised a brow. "Not that you dingus...those...that thing your wearing...the um..." Karkat was struggling to find the correct word. Thankfully Dave chuckled and replied with sunglasses or shades. Karkat nodded.  
"So I got to get you wet to get to see your tail?"  
Karkat nodded to the inquisition bestowed upon him. Though gasping as Dave picked him up for the umpteenth time that day and took him to this weird enclosure with a bowl that had water in it and an even bigger empty bowl and then a small bowl with this silver thing that was dripping water. He was so confused but allowed Dave to undress his lower half as the human got the bigger bowl filled with a bit of water. Soon he transferred Karkat in and waited. Eager to see the transformation and half expecting the boy to glow white and enter some weird anime transformation.  
But instead Dave watched skin change to scales as Karkat pulled off the shirt that had been handed to him. His legs mending together and creating his radical red tail. The beautiful color exotic with the colouration's and contrast of Kar's skin that turned from pale to a grey-ish red with black stripes lazily painted on along with bio-luminescent specks of red freckles that gave off a soft dim light.  
Karkat gave unenthusiastic jazz hands and a half-heartedly said tada and soon let himself relax into the comforting water. "Now to get back to the ocean" he purred in a soft breath. Dave trying to contain his cool-kid attitude but he wanted to leap out of his skin and giggle like a kid at the sight before him. And the purring only made it harder to keep his facade.  
The little smile coming onto Karkat's face with his closed eyes was just too much for him to handle. "Holy shit you are so cute" Dave whispered from where he'd taken residence on the toilet's lid. "Mmh, what?" Karkat opened an eye to look at Dave with a half lidded eye. The human's breath hitching to a stop as Karkat opened both his beautiful crimson orbs to look at him wide eyed. "What the fuck is in your pants? What is in there making a dent? Dave what the hell? Is it a weapon?" Karkat asked with disgust.  
Starting to push himself away from Dave who looked between his legs and cursed. Dave looked back up at Karkat sheepishly. "Its called a human boner. I'll be right back" he chuckled nervously as he exited. Though quickly returned with his head in the doorway. "Don't move" he said and began leaving again. "Like I have anywhere else to go?" Karkat shouted angrily before crossing his arms and flopping his tail.  
"The fuck is a boner anyway?" he wondered. Closing his eyes as he let himself relax once again when he heard some strange noises from a few doors down. He raised a brow in question and blushed when he realized what was happening. "DAVE WHAT THE HELL!? I CAN HERE YOU!" Karkat screamed. Covering his face with his hands. "LET IT HAPPEN! Oh god..." Dave replied. Purposely moaning louder to piss off Karkat. "YOU HUMANS ARE DISGUSTING!" he shouted. Face red as his tail.  
When it was over Karkat had dragged himself from the tub and was attempting to close the door so he could keep Dave from getting in. He was so grossed out that that just happened. Gosh what had he gotten himself into? Karkat whined as he just gave up with moving his lower half all together since it was so annoyingly heavy.  
Looking behind him with distaste as it ever so fucking slowly dried. It would be awhile before he could even move...he crossed his arms and sat his chin on them as he looked at the cold white squares. Defeated and completely lost in himself. I am so sorry Eridan he thought.  
Ignoring the sound of feet heading his way as he shoved his face into his crossed arms. Tail curling behind him as someone knelt down. "Yo you okay?" Dave asked. Karkat shook his head. Missing his ocean home and his best friend. Dave sighed. "Sorry for being to loud" he mumbled, thinking Karkat was just disgusted and bummed out. Sitting on the tiles across from him as he looked at the magnificent lower half of Mr. Rage-face's buttocks. "Its not that fuckass" he whispered. Looking up and glaring at Dave's shades.  
"I miss the ocean...to be honest I don't even know how long I was on that beach. FUCK!" Karkat growled. Rolling onto his back as he laid his hands on his stomach. Looking at the ceiling before a certain Strider leaned into his vision. "Dave, get the ever living fuck out of my face before I punch you" Karkat warned. The Dave in his vision raising his hands up as he slid from said vision.  
There was silence within the room for a bit. Neither acknowledging the other for the simple fact that it was kind of an embarrassing moment seeing as Dave had left not just moments ago to relieve himself. Though Karkat knew he had to say something at one point. Both weren't going to learn anything of the other anytime soon with the aggravating silence.  
"I may be wrong..." Karkat muttered. Dave turning his head in his direction to show he was listening. "...but I think we have a mer equivalent to a boner. Just different." he said delicately. Bringing his tail up so that he could admire it shortly before letting it flop back down. "Oh really? What, does your tail expand?" Dave snorted at his joke.  
Karkat glaring at him. "Well fine you mernapping piece of shit I won't tell you what a mermaid boner is" red eyes rolled in their place as a palm kneaded between black eyebrows. "Okay, sorry. This is serious shit. What the hell do your glorious fishy boners look like? Explain it to me in disgustingly vivid detail like were in some nudist art class that has to paint this dudes knockers because we need to pass or some shit with an A plus if were lucky because Ms. Frizzle is all touchy about male genitalia and if we fuck up she'll kill us with.......brownies" Dave rambled.  
The mermaid currently lying on the ground did his best to keep his eye from twitching in annoyance as he listened. Aggravated by the human's lack to control itself. but it was whatever. Not all humans could ramble this much, could they? Though soon Dave's tangent came to an end after he explained in extensive detail why brownies from Ms. Frizzle are dangerous and should never be trusted.  
"Okay well first off; The fuck is Ms. Frizzle? And second; Are you fucking done pouring insidious words from your vocal harp and cram it so I can explain the sexual reproductive organs of mers?" Karkat growled. Not even attempting to look at the brown skinned boy who'd practically kidnapped him. Practically? Get real Karkat he definitely kidnapped you. Its plainly obvious.  
He even has you in this atrocious looking area that has really cool tiles. And not cool as in awesome but cool as in cold and relaxing. Which you prefer greatly to any warmth on this forsaken oyster dare called by the name Earth. Not something mers are exactly in happy possession of. Heats unbearably deadly to the higher-bloods like Eridan. Though the hemospectrum was tossed out long ago- its still sometimes referred to for good reasons like heat resistance on blood caste- thankfully your a mutant so warm waters don't bother you much.  
"Yeah sure. Feed me this shit storm" Dave said. A stoic expression across his face as he looked at Karkat almost expectantly. "Perfect! Now I can dive head fucking first into this lava infested river!" he sneered. Beginning to explain where mer intimates hid and how they developed with age. Talking of how males are born with bulges but later grow nooks and how females in contrast are born with nooks but later grow bulges.  
Explaining the wonders of their unisex reproduction system and how it has benefited them since the discovery of the mother-glubs. But finally telling him what a mer boner was and how one could find out if a mer, in mermaid form, had a boner. All complicated and complex yet somehow Dave had jotted down the useless information and just kind of nodded when Kar finished. "That was...wow" Dave said.  
Karkat shrugged. "Its not important. But please get me to the ocean! I need to help save my friend!" he demanded. Slamming his hand onto the tile before propping himself up and looking at Dave angrily. "Now fucking take me there you piece of shrimp shit" voice rolling off his lips in aggression as his eyes narrowed.  
Dave raised a brow and scoffed. "Not with that attitude, Karkat" he stated simply. Standing up and stretching as Karkat began trying to hoist himself up onto the toilet so he could sit more comfortably.  
"Fine! Fuckass..." Karkat growled. "I'll....drag myself...there" he murmured. Pushing off from the toilet as he began dragging himself again since trying to sit on the toilet seemed like to much work. Dave looking at him with pity at the poor pathetic creature. "Karkat no" Dave mumbled. "Karkat yes" Karkat replied. Getting himself to the carpeted area of which he looked at with erratic fear. Biting his lip but forcing himself to continue on. Dave watching in pain as the poor mermaid dragged his lower-half behind him.  
Still the mermaid had a magnificent ass for...well...a mermaid. Like Jesus Dave can't you take your eyes off it? The poor guy is in pain from a rug burn thanks to dragging himself.  
So in pity Dave goes up behind him and picks him up. Cradling the adorable ball of rage who immediately started squirming in his strong grip. Though as Dave started walking he pushed himself into the human. Burying his head in the bite-able neck, his horns barely grazing glorious brown skin, his pumper damning him to hell for enjoying this just the slightest bit, and yet Karkat let himself start to fall asleep to the rythmic sound of Dave's heartbeat.  
Eyes lidded with sleep as he wrapped an arm around the human. Curling his tail around the arm holding that end very slightly for some kind of reassurance. Completely unaware of how badly Dave was blushing and how wide his eyes were beneath his glasses. Oh sweet Satan Dave Elizabeth Strider is holding the demonized, though still cute, male version of Ariel from the Little Mermaid and there is no way that he wants to set the poor thing down soon since he's now snoring softly with sleep.  
So instead of going toward the beach he walked up to his room and set Karkat in the bed before stripping himself of his shirt and climbing in as well. Cuddling the sea scented teenager who was probably much younger than him. Maybe by four years from what it looked like.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cuddles yo


	4. Whats Eridan Up To?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eridan starts rethinking his crush. Dave doesn't know where Karkles is.

Eridan was with the pod in one of their many homes. As nomads they followed where the food they ate went. Recently their food was sticking in one place for this summer and him and Karkat had planned to swim away to avoid Eridan getting married and killed. Sure the mating sounded okay but he didn't like the person he'd be mating with! She may be the princess soon to be queen but Eridan Oceanus Ampora had his heart set on one mermaid and that was Sollux Captor.  
The two-legged mermaid, who on the old caste system was deemed a yellow blood, was Eridan's firt love. But man was he a sight to behold. The two-legged mers were always interesting to the violet-tailed seadweller but it was Sollux who he fell for besides all the others. Maybe its because he would catch him outside of the territory even when he were sure no one saw him leave.  
But right now Eridan was flushed against a column long since been corroded by the water's undercurrents to hide from the psionic wielding yellow bloods on his trail. He needed to find Karkat but shit the storm tore the two apart. The departure had been a tearful one and his eyes felt awkward and had a slight film of violet over them from the tears he had shed.  
"Where did that fucker go?" a female yellow-blood growled. "I dunno...come on. Lets try another reef. He'll have to stop hiding at some point and accept our future queen as his mate" a male one replied. A second female agreed and he waited for their body heat to exhaust the area before he moved even an inch.  
Yet as soon as he felt safe he began to propel himself far away from the corroded column. Two-legged mermaids were fast but a double finned mer was almost comparable. Especially shark type like Eridan. Though he guessed him being a double finned shark type was the only reason the future queen wanted him to help conceive her children.  
To be honest it all seemed pretty fucked up to him. He was only being used. There was no real love involved at all. Gosh dammit get a hold of yourself Ampora.  
Eridan kept swimming forward. His violet markings illuminated in the darkness of the ocean depth. Just a simple reminder that he must find Karkat. At all costs.  
They had an entire plan to go find Princess Feferi's pod and live with her in peace and safety away from Condesce's. Meenah was going to be a terrifying mate. He could already sense it. She was to malicious for his taste. "Hey!" shit!  
With the velocity he was going at he was bound to slam into whoever it was. And they collided at full force. Eridan throwing his arms around the person to steady himself as they were knocked a few feet into the zero gravity provided by the water. "Yo dumbathth what the fuck?" bi-colored eyes glared down at the shark now in his arms. Violet mixing into a locked gaze with blue and red.  
The first time they had been this close. Usually Eridan was a few meters away when the psionic weilder caught him on a scavenge. "Huuuh....uhh.....h-hi" he blushed. Blinking as he straightened softly in Sol's grip. "Tch, don't hi me. Aren't you that little fish dick that'th been trying to ethcape the thafety groundth?" Sollux seethed. Pushing Eridan away from him who in return glared at him. "Wwell yes I am! Wwhat are ya gonna do? Take me back to my wwretched fate!" Eridan hissed. Baring his much sharper teeth at the two-legged dweller.  
The yellow-blood pushed up his black rimmed spectacles and rolled his eyes. "Oh fucking pleathe! Like I care what the emprethth doeth with thome peathant when she could be with thith!" Sollux pointed his thumbs at himself. Eridan's face blanked for a moment. "You...you realize she eats you right after...that's a terrible..." he was starting to rethink this crush of his.  
Sure their prior interactions were short and clipped but now that they're actually having a real-ish one...he rather continue looking for Karkat. He shook his head as the man he liked shrugged his shoulders with a smirk. "Hey at leatht I'm thomething to look forward to." he bragged.  
Eridan taking in a deep breath from his gills and blowing it out as he looked at Sol with the look of a shocked and disappointed parent. "I can't believve myself right noww..." Eridan swam past Sollux. Eyes wide as he swam away. Blinking at the interaction he'd just had. Sollux blinking as well as Eridan just swam away.  
His double fin becoming smaller and smaller as he made a slow escape in shock.

Elsewhere Dave rolled over. Feeling for the cuddling object he had next to him a couple moments. A groan escaping him as he felt nothing but a cold bed space. "Where'd you go?" he murmured. Using his other hand to feel for his shades that weren't on the beside.  
He forced open his eyes regardless of there being a stranger that was not present. "Karkat?" he said a bit urgently. Looking around the room to see his drawer had been raided and the closet. "KARKAT?" he yelled. Pushing off the bed and grabbing a shirt before running downstairs. Running past the kitchen where a certain Bro was sitting with his arms crossed.  
Dave stopping when he realized there was such a certain Bro in the kitchen looking rather parental, for once. He back tracked and waved at Bro Strider, his older brother. "Yo, s'up. Have you seen my friend?" Dave asked. Bro took a long sip from his apple juice. The two Striders holding a blank faced staring contest that neither would know if they won or not.  
"The shouty guy with horns?" Bro drawled. "Haven't seen 'im" he added nonchalantly. Dave giving a suspicious uh-huh in response. "Actually DirkJake took him to the pond, nice choice in a boyfriend, Dave. When were you going to tell me you had found Ariel, Prince Eric?" Bro smirked as Dave scoffed. "We aren't dating! Besides I think he's against me since I kinda sorta didn't take him to the ocean like I said." Dave rubbed the back of his neck as he looked to the side.  
Bro nodded. Chuckling. "Well anyway. DirkJake has him" Bro concluded.  
"You know its Dirk AND Jake not their names combined, right?"  
"Have you learned nothing from anime?"  
"Uhhh" Dave gulped. "I guess not" he shrugged. Bro shook his head. "Get out of my sight you disgust me. Hatin' on my OTP- sonofabitch" Bro shook his head again in disappointment, raising the apple juice to his lips. Dave just raised a brow at him and left with a silent okay.


	5. The Ocean~!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> KARKAT GO INTO OCEAN AT END A CHAPTA

"So your a mermaid!?" Jake asked. Admiring Karkat's tail. "Yes, Jake" he replied. Sitting comfortably on a rock with his tail dipped in the cooled pond he had rejuvenated in after being scared shittless waking up next to a tattooed and half naked Dave.  
"Thats so unbelievably cool! Golly garden-men I think I might squeal myself to death! This is such an amazing discovery!" Jake giggled. Dirk squat behind him with his shades on like all the Strider's did, as Karkat had come to realize. "Yeah, yeah. I guess it is. Its not that amazing" he murmured. Rubbing the back of his neck as Jake fan-boyed. Though Jake's face contorted, wide eyes of insanity, and a forced loving smile. "Dirk, get Lil' Cal offa me or I'll flip ya into the water" Jake warned. Karkat smiling at the weird puppet around Jake's neck and hanging off his shoulder.  
"Come on Jake its-" Dirk put his hand on Jake's shoulder and was then slam-dunked into the water near Kar's tail. "I'm only stuck on this trip because you wanted me here- don't get weird I'll go back to my island of adventures!" he warned as the speck wearing hipster stood up, soaked from the pond water. Karkat laughed along with Jake as Dirk walked over and took Cal from Jake's backside. "I'm sorry" he whispered. "Yeah you just want to get laid tonight, well it ain't happening mate!" Jake stated proudly.  
"I love you" Dirk said as he began walking home with Lil' Cal. "Love you too, you blimey fool" Jake shouted. Karkat smiling at how adorable the two seemed. "You guys are cute for a land-dwelling couple" he commented.  
Jake nodding but then scooting closer to Karkat. "Actually Kar your the first otha mer I've seen since I left my pod for Dirk, those Strider fools still don't know my secret!" Jake chuckled. Karkat blinking wildly at this information. "But where are...how...eh?" Karkat tilted his head. Watching as Jake peeled off his green jacket and shirt and moved for Karkat to see the scarred design on his chest.  
The symbol made him think of hope. "I got a sea witch to take away my mermaid voodoo. Also me and Dirk mostly talked over an app so he never got to see any of my stuff and I was also raised by an old woman who rescued me from a hippo-campus attack" he explained. "But now I am here. Happily living a lie as a human" Jake sighed. Picking up a pebble and tossing it into the water.  
Karkat furrowed his brows. Feeling bad for the fellow even though they had just met this morning. "You gave up this for a human?" Kar breathed. Jake nodded. "If you want to know if I ever think of going back then my answer is plenty. I love Dirk but sometimes...if you haven't noticed he is quite possessive of me like I might slip through his fingers" Jake chuckled. Karkat sighing with a nod. "What blood were you and class rank?" Kar asked in curiosity.  
Jake chuckled as he pulled on his shirt and jacket; "Forest-green blood and I was training to be a mother-glub caretaker" he responded. "So how did you get here?" Jake asked once he had his jacket on. Karkat smiling as he began to jump into the hurricane and how it ripped him away from his pal Eridan though Dave had run up halfway through and shoved Karkat into the water. Jake stifling a laugh as the mer rose from the water and glared at him. "DAVE ELIZABETH STRIDER!" Karkat shouted.  
"Talk to you later, Kar!" Jake said. Getting up and running off to find Dirk to give Dave and Karkat privacy. "Why didn't you wake me up?" Dave asked. Sliding into the water with Karkat who swam out into a deeper part. Forcing Dave to swim after him.  
"Because you were peaceful and I didn't want you to take care of your human boner, which was poking me in the side, in front of me" Karkat snorted. Finally finding a spot he relaxed in. Dave floating atop the surface as Kar blew bubbles in the water.  
"I wouldn't have masturbated in front of you. That is wrong on so many levels. Besides you wrecked my room" Dave said matter-of-factly. Karkat smirked. "Surprised you didn't wake up from all my cussing, to be honest. Jake and Dirk were the ones who helped me out" he sighed. Tipping his head back in relaxation. His tail brushing against Dave's feet under the water which caused a shiver to run through the human's spine at the slimey feeling.  
"Okay, I'll thank them later for that after cleaning your mess. Now anyway when did you want me to take you to the ocean so you can swim away never to be seen again?" Dave asked. Karkat straightened in the water. "Now?" he asked.  
Karkat looked hopefully into Dave's shades expectantly.

Dave grunted as he held Karkat in his arms. Nearing the ledge he used to come to everytime he and Dirk got into fights when they were younger. Remembering the tears he shed here but suppressing them as he knew there were too many people cleaning up the beach right now because of what happened. "Okay, this ledge here is very fucking special to me so don't go making fun of jutting rocks and shit and the pink spray paint everywhere" he warned. Hopping over a log as Karkat tightened his grip on Dave's neck.  
"The hell is spray paint and why the hell would I care? Just get me to the ocean!" Karkat growled. Looking forward as they broke onto a well worn rocky path with the trees starting to scatter beside them until it was just a rock wall on the right and beach too the left of the slightly bumpy path. Dave sighed. "Never mind. Its just a really radical place so don't talk about it snidely or I'll hand you over to them" he said pointedly.  
Karkat's eyes going wide as he nods. Looking over at the ocean close by as it soon took over where the sand was previously. The water was so close yet so far. Lapping against the rocky ledge that was at least an inch above and slowly rising too be a foot as they turned a corner and came to a spacious clearing with symbols painted in pink and a bunch of other stuff littering the black stone surface. Gray patches breaking out here and there as Dave set Karkat on the ground to catch his breath.  
Red eyes looking around with interest as he soaked in the scenery. It was so surreal looking. Though soon his eyes landed on the stony spires jutting up from the sides of the ledge they were on. The water splashing indiscreetly.  
Yet it still remained surreal as Dave picked him up again. "Why are there spires?" he murmured to himself beneath his breath. Eyes wide in amazement. Noticing a place where the ledge dipped down to allow someone to simply slide into the water, where the spires parted wide enough to allow an escape. "I don't know. They'd been here since I was a child" the human responded. Moving over to the slide he'd created for when he wanted to swim around the area.  
Reminiscing how his fingers bled from chipping away at the hard rock with nothing but a sword and his nails to create the dip. Setting the cancer down on the slightly submerged slope and allowing him to swim under. Watching the mermaid disappear beneath the water whom wore a delighted grin.  
"Bye, Karkat" he whispered. Cracking his back and grunting at the pain coming from his arms and legs. They burned from the walk and carrying that fifty ton mer. Okay perhaps he wasn't fifty ton but it was enough to make him wanna workout more.  
Dave walked over to a beach towel he'd left here and sat down on it. Picking up the old barbie doll he played with. Smiling at the short shitty hair cut he gave her and the small glasses he made with pieces of his last pair of aviators. Looking up when he heard someone clear their throat. Karkat looking at him as he fits himself between some of the spires.  
"Don' you have to go save your pal?" Dave reminds. Raising a brow at him as he continues to hold the doll with no shame. "I wanted to tell you I might return" Dave held back the relief of getting to see the mythical creature again. "Really?" he drawls. Karkat rolling his eyes at the tiny smirk on the human's lips.  
"Yeah. If I can't find Eridan then I'll come here around midnight. Alright? If not then I either got killed, captured, both, or found Eridan and left to go find sanctuary" Kar said. Moving away from the spires and sinking till only his eyes were showing above the water. "Okay. I guess I'll be coming back here, then..." Dave said. Containing his excitement as Karkat nodded and sunk into the water. His tail flicking up from above before splashing back down and signaling he was gone.


	6. I'm Trying To Be

Dave returned at two o'clock. Angry at himself for falling asleep to that stupid conair movie that John had forced him to watch over their skype call. How the hell did he allow that to happen? Oh right because he has a big gay crush on the Egderp.  
His head shakes to the sides as he jumps over the log and runs to the clearing. Seeing no Karkat in sight. Bending over and slamming his hands on his bent knees as he gulped in air. He really needed to work on stamina. Matter of fact he strifed a lot he really would think his stamina would be pretty damn good but no. Lets fuck over the youngest Strider.  
When he opens his eyes and looks up he sees Karkat hoisting himself up the slope. His tail flicking behind him under the water's dark surface as he looks up. "I couldn't find him..." Kar whispered softly. His eyes having a film of red over them as red tinted tears slipped from his cheeks.  
Dave getting to his knees and crawling over, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him up. Causing Dave to fall back and Kar to crush him. There was a sexual joke he wanted to make. But the time was obviously not the right one to be making flirtatious comments. Karkat sniffled as he flopped his head onto Dave's chest. Clenching the fabric on his shoulder's as he began wailing like a child who lost their toy.  
But Dave knew better. This wasn't just the wail of a child losing a toy it was the wail of someone whose lost their friend. "Shh, Karkat...shh..." he whispered. Nervously patting his back with one hand and rubbing it with the other. "Shh" he whispered again. Letting one of his hands leave Kar's back to pet the wet hair that still held some feather-like touch.  
"I don't know what to do! I couldn't even find the pod! THIS FUCKING SUCKS!" Karkat yelled, voice muffled by Dave's chest. He nodded. Squeezing the mer's hips with his thighs reassuringly. "I know, Kar, I know. Its okay." he whispered.  
Sighing as he allowed Karkat too cry and lay on top of him. Letting his head settle on the rock beneath him as he stared up at the sky. The beginnings of ran pattering down lightly on them. Small drops sliding to the corners of the shades as he rubbed Karkat's back. Running a finger up and down his spine as the ran got harder. Ruining Dave's perfect hair. That ticked him off but he wouldn't voice that since he had a fucking mermaid lying on him.  
Beside the obvious saddness supposedly going on the air he just couldn't stop thinking I have a mermaid on me, a real life mermaid, like Ariel's demonic cousin from Davy John's Locker kind of mermaid on top of me right this instant he let out a shaky sigh through his nose. Listening to Karkat sob for who knows how long till the rain didn't really bother him anymore.  
It was almost romantic lying there with Karkat, yet he of course would never admit such, opting to just act like Kar's friend. Yet when Karkat finally pryed his soaked body from Dave he realized how much he'd rather be at the house, dry and warm. Even though the mer was like a blade left in the fire to long he much preferred dryness.  
"Okay, you can carry me back to the whatever the fuck that was" Karkat grumbled. Lifting up his arms as he looked at the ground. Allowing himself to be carried bridal style back to the house.

Jake polished his pistol for the eleventh time. Smiling at how it shined before placing it aside on the night stand. Raveling in the fact that he had gone almost an entire week with the Striders without Dirk trying anything with him- or being overly possessive like he used to and sort of still was. They had broken up because of that simple factoid, perhaps other facts as well, and they still weren't dating to this day.  
He supposed it was a break of sorts...though neither planned to really split ways, especially Jake since he really had nothing else to do. He'd given up all he did know for the loser he almost regretfully called his boyfriend.  
"Can I sle-", "No" Jake murmured. Looking down at Dirk who was on the floor in a sleeping bag. "Just for to-" Jake shook his head. Lifting his eyebrows slightly as he smiled. Dirk sighed and let his head loll onto the pillow as he gave up. "You lost that privilege, ol' chap" he informed. Slipping his legs beneath the covers as he scooted down into a laying position. The men silent as they thumbed over thoughts on their relationship.  
Both wondering numbly when they could actually say they were dating, again. Meanwhile on the floor Dirk bit his bottom lip. Trying not to remember how Jake would cuddle with him during harsh storms. He had gotten to cuddle only once this trip but that was because of the large storm that had blown in from the ocean.  
He still never fully understood why Jake was so scared of the great breasts of the ocean. Perhaps being surrounded by it his whole life traumatized him? As far as Dirk was aware of Jake lived with an elderly woman on an island. Of which Dirk promptly refused to believe until they had skyped once- that was at the beginning of their friendship. My how things have progressed and also taken am unwanted seat to the back of romance of the romance train.  
There were flames for him once...but he just couldn't feel them. Especially since Lil' Cal was around. Creepy ass puppet would suck up all his nerves and he just couldn't deal. He really thought Dirk might have noticed this turn of events but he never did so he broke it off.  
Yet like most humans he fought to keep Jake. Making a bunch of crazy promises that the ex-mer knew he couldn't keep. It just wasn't in his love's nature. He wiped away a trail of tears and looked at the wetness on his hand, gulping as he forced himself to bury farther into the pillow. He really did love Dirk.  
But at one point the puppets, the irony, the lack of heart, effort, and care seeped into his poor reality. He blamed himself for all these happenings till he realized it wasn't all his fault. "Jake, are you okay?" he felt a tug on the blanket bringing him back to the present. Waving his hand down at Dirk as a way to shoo him off.  
"I'm fine mate its just some old memories and stuff giving my brain a run for its money" he replied groggily. Listening to Dirk moving over him before he looked up at the orange eyes. Those eyes were so beautiful to him. He hated how he barely saw them.  
"Babe your crying. What did I do? Was it my brother? Which experiences are you taking from the abyss of our past and mulling over?" Dirk asked. His blond hair falling over his dark brown skin as he looked down intently into the forest green eyes. Jake gave him a soft smile, turning onto his back for a better view. "Its fine, Dirk, they're just tupid memories" assured the man.  
Dirk's face turning into fine lines as he placed his forehead against Jake's. Locking their eyes together as he spoke, "Babe I don't give a fuck if you think their stupid you are crying and if you don't tell me why waters leaking from your eye, I, myself will cry". He caressed his lover's cheek. Giving his lips a timid kiss.  
"I don't wanna talk about it, the emotions they bring aren't too friendly a playmate" commented Jake. Dirk sighing, breath dusting over the larger boy beneath him. They stayed in that position for awhile. Losing themselves in each others eye and mourning over regrets.  
Timidly Dirk stuttered out, "I l-love you...Jake". He closed his eyes like he'd been wounded. "Shit I didn't mean to stutter" he mumbled. "Its fine I l-love you too" Jake half-assedly mocked.  
Kissing Dirk softly for what felt like seconds before they pulled away. The Strider slipping into the blanket and curling up close to Jake. Giving a small smile as strong tan arms went around him. Pulling him into a tight embrace as they ignored the problems at hand.  
"Your so small" Jake whispered. "Oh fuck you man" Dirk insinuated back. "Its like holding a teddy bear" he teased. "A teddy bear with cool shades and- Jake are you grabbing my ass?" Dirk blushed as Jake gave a soft laugh. "Its soft" he murmured.

Bro flipped through a magazine in his designated room. Old memories of high-school swarming his thoughts as he tried to look for something to distract him from said memories. Not wanting to think back on the boy he once was.  
Or the boy who was once doing him. No he couldn't allow that to bother him now of all things. He had to spend time with family and not be a jackass for once. If that were even possible. He is Broderick Strider; the coldest of the cold with an irony meter choked with every ironic thing he's done. Sure that may make no sense but after all there isn't anything that can truly be done.  
After all he can hear Dave panting as he walks into the house all the way from his room. The not so soft voice of Karkat telling him they both need to get dry and yeah now he see's why he can't concentrate. There's budding romance and one trying to be fixed. Who wouldn't that affect?  
He sighs. Falling back onto the bed and setting the magazine to the side in defeat as he lets high-school days blind him with a terribly strong aggression to fuck him up.


	7. With You But Were Apart

Dave falls onto his bed as Karkat curls in beside him. His eyes wide from beneath his shades. His face painted red as the mer falls asleep peacefully while he has to live the next few minutes trying his best not to get a boner again. He had seen Karkat full on naked, again. And this was something he didn't really want to be a common occurrence.  
"Help me" he mouthed as he looked at the doorway where Bro was standing. "Don't touch the butt" Bro advised quietly. Dave gave a rushed thumbs up and Bro gave one back before walking away in pink lingerie. Okay maybe THAT shouldn't be an occurrence either but lingerie is better than naked, at least in his opinion.  
Plus this is his Bro and he is a Strider and Strider's do anything for the sake of irony. That's just how things work in the Strider household. Yet the advice is probably a good one. No butt touching.  
Especially to someone you don't even know and could have abilities that could kill. Yeah not a chance Dave was gonna take...yet. He would touch the butt one day. Though with a sigh he turned and wrapped an arm around Karkat's midsection and pulled the warm creature to his chest. Cuddling comfortably before setting his shades to the side and going to bed.

Karkat woke up the next day sprawled on the bed sacrificially with Dave lying on him. He knit his brows together in confusion. "How the fuck...?" he whispered. Looking side to side to see he was trapped by this brute. With that revelation he let his head fall back onto the pillow with a groan as he waited for Dave to roll off and stop cuddling him.  
It felt like hours before he was freed. And with this new found freedom he struggled out of the blankets and fell on the floor with a thud. Standing up quickly and rubbing the small of his back before walking over to the closet to change his shirt.  
Pulling off the one he was currently in and grabbing a long sleeved one. Looking at it quizzically before pulling it on. Blinking as he pulled it down to look at the design, this shirt also had a hood on it with strings to tighten it and pockets. His eyes widened and he started flapping his arms. Looking as the sleeves as they flapped.  
He stopped only moments after to pull the hood up and shuffle his way to the kitchen. Still a little clumsy with his human legs. Once there he sat beside Jake feeling a wave of safety from the older ex-mermaid. "Mornin' Karkat!" Jake said. Pecking his forehead in greeting. "Morning Jake" Karkat responded, kissing his forehead as well.  
Bro raising a brow and Dirk slammed a hand to his chest dramatically. Faking pain as he ate his cereal. "Oh calm down you got enough of me last night, mate" Jake winked. Dirk dropped his spoon into the bowl and put his hands up as he turned to Bro who just waggled his brows. "No" Dirk whispered. Shaking his head. "He lies" he added.  
Jake rolled his eyes as he chuckled. "So how was your sleep?" Jake asked kindly, Dirk shaking his head in the background as Bro nodded. Another silly morning with the Striders it seemed.  
"I woke up with Dave lying on me. Other wise I slept pretty well." he answered as a bowl of cereal was sat down beside him. This time knowing how to hold the spoon handed to him. "What about you?" Karkat questioned with a quirked brow as he began to eat. "Got laid" Jake shrugged his shoulders and Dirk just slammed his hands on the table and looked at Jake in disbelief.  
"Cool" Karkat rose his hand for a high five which he was returned. Jake looked over at Dirk finally. "What?" he murmured innocently. Dirk tossed his arms in front of him. "Shall I announce to the world that I got a dick up my ass last night or just let you flaunt our sex life to my FAM-IL-Y?" he asked. "I like the latter" Jake teased. Dirk sighed.  
Giving up as he went back to eating. Bro ruffling his hair as he walked by to go wake up Dave. Jake smiled ear to ear as he turned his attention back to Karkat. "Didn't find Eridan?" he asked. Karkat shook his head. "I'll continue looking...just not now" he whispered. Jake nodded. "Want some orange juice?" he asked as he stood up. "Yeah, thanks" Karkat murmured.  
Jake walked over to Dirk and kissed his cheek before opening a cabinet. "Fuck you" Dirk muttered. "I did that last night" Jake responded with a giggle. Dirk smiling as he held back a laugh so he could continue eating. "Get me some apple juice" he said. Reaching a hand behind him to grope Jake's ass. "Dirk no" he said. Grabbing two cups. "Dirk yes" he responded.  
Whining when Jake absconded over to the fridge. Karkat shook his head at them as he ate. Turning his head over to see a sleepy dork sit down on his left while Broderick went back to cooking. A glass of apple juice being placed in front of Dirk and orange juice in front of Karkat.  
"Morning" Dave rubbed at his eyes. "Morning" Karkat sighed. "How was your sleep?" Dave asked. "I woke up with you laying on me you fucking nookchaffer" he growled, getting some weird looks but they dissipated rather quick. Dave smiled. "Couldn't keep my sleepy self away" he taunted. Karkat rolling his eyes.  
"What about you Dirk?" he looked up. Dirk about to say something when Jake answered for him, "He didn't sleep last night" Dirk rested his head on his hand. "GOOD to know you two made up" Dave clapped. "Because I want to wake up every morning with that information on my mind" he shook his head as a bowl of cereal was sat down in front of him.  
Bro chuckled. Happy to be surrounded by the lively chatter.

Once breakfast was over Karkat and Jake immediately hightailed it and left the three brothers alone to talk. Something they desperately needed. So once they were sure Jake and Karkat were gone they converged in the living room in their respective chairs.  
"Alright so we have a mermaid in our presence" Bro stated. Dirk and Dave nodding while Dave held a clipboard in hand. "How long will he stay? We know his name is Karkat and that he's looking for a friend" Bro murmured. Another round of nods erupting as Dave took notes. "Dave got a boner over him and proceeded to masturbate his first day in our home" Broderick added.  
A round of nods but Dave stopped to glare at him over his glasses. "Fuck you, man" he whispered. "Will you be losing your virginity anytime soon, young Strider?" Bro queried. Another round of nods and aggressive clapping from Dave. "Will you get it in the ass?" Dirk leaned over toward him as Dave stopped clapping and looked off into the distance like he was in the office as Bro also looked at the young Strider.  
Dave pretended to think before looking at his brothers. "My asshole shall be taken by mer-cock" he replied softly, grabbing his clipboard as he crossed his legs over the other and strikes a dramatically promiscuous pose. Bro and Dirk nodded. "He continues the bottom lineage" Bro announces, gesturing a hand toward his younger brother before resting his hands back on the arm chair.  
Dirk nods in response. Dave relaxing into a lazy position since the other was hurting him. "Okay so is that it?" Dave asked, wondering if this was the only reason they converged in the living room. "For you. Now Dirk. How did you get Jake to put his, quote on quote, "huge ass cock", end quote, in your, quote on quote, "tiny asshole", end quote?" Bro asked as Dave nodded, whipping the clipboard closer to his face, slowly rising his pen just above the clipboard and clicking it five times before setting it on the paper.  
Ironically the ink was gone. He was using an empty pen on purpose. For ironic reasons.

"So whats it like fucking a human?"Karkat asked as he bathed on the beach. Jake wearing a pair of shades as he rests on the side of the mer in a perpendicular fashion. "They don't have nooks- I have discovered. Males have something called an anus, females have an anus, too I should mention, which waste leaves from and then piss comes out of this thing called a penis but that's for males, women just have a tiny whole above this thing called a vagina, have you seen a penis?" Jake asked. "Yeah" Karkat sighs as he rests his head on his arms.  
"Wait Dave's shown you his dick?" Jake lifted the shades with an incredulous look on his face. Karkat snarled in reply. "FUCK NO!" he shouted. "If he did I don't remember from being overly terrified." Karkat hissed. Then Jake slowly remembered.  
"Oh right when....fuck me mate I forgot that for a moment!" Jake chuckled, shaking his head as he set the shades back down over his eyes. Karkat rolled his red orbs as he looked at the sand. "Your special" the Vantas concurred as he raised himself to his elbows. Looking over at Jake who shrugged.  
"Its been awhile since I've gone and lost my tail, ol' chap." the Englishman sighed as he looked down at his legs with longing. "Why did you do it? I mean I know you said its because you fell in love..but why?" Karkat questioned curiously.  
Jake let out a breath and looked up at the rolling waves. Staying silent before beginning to speak, "Like I said before I fell in love but I didn't think of the consequences- or I at least phrased it in a way like that, I believe" Jake murmured. Using his big toe to begin drawing shapes into the sand.  
The two fell silent. Mulling over the events that have lead to this moment or at least lead to them having been trapped like this. Each of their tales of woe both starting differently but just the same as well.

Eridan had swam faster than his body should have. Finding a place to rest he curled around himself. Looking out the cave entrance as his markings glew dimly to allow him to see a bit better since his night vision had never been the best. The darkness of the flooded cave making him shiver softly as he laid his head on his crossed arms which were pressed on the rock beneath him.  
He just wanted to see Karkat again. His dear friend. Was Karkat even alive?


End file.
